Cdn Woman with beer Cdn BeaverA recent study found the average Canadian walks about 900 miles a year.
Another study found Canadians drink, on average, 22 gallons of beer a year.

That means,
on average, Canadians get about 41 miles to the gallon.

Kind Of Makes one Proud To Be Canadian, doesn’t it??!!

A Ukrainian and a Newfoundland wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic Gold medal.

Before the final match, the Newfie wrestler’s trainer came to him and said,  “Now, don’t forget all the research we’ve done on this Ukie. He’s never lost a match, because of this pretzel hold he has. So, whatever you do, do not let him get you in that hold!! If he does, you’re finished !!”

The Newfie nodded in acknowledgment……..

As the match started, the Newfie and the Ukrainian circled each other several times, looking for an opening.   All of a sudden, the Ukie lunged forward,……… grabbing the Newfie and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold. A sigh of disappointment arose from the crowd and the trainer buried his face in his hands, for he knew all was lost.   He couldn’t bare to watch the inevitable happen…..

Suddenly, there was a scream, then a cheer from the crowd and the trainer raised his eyes just in time to watch the Ukrainian go flying up in the air.   His back hit the mat with a thud and the Newfoundlander collapsed on top of him, making the pin and winning the match.   The trainer was astounded !!……….

When he finally got his wrestler alone, he asked:   “How the hell did you ever get out of that hold?? No one has ever done it before!!….”

The wrestler answered:   “Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold but at the last moment, I opened my eyes and saw this pair of testicles, right in front of my face. I had nothing to lose, so with my last ounce of strength I stretched out my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I could !!”

The trainer exclaimed:   “So, THAT’S what finished him off !!….”
“Not really”…………. replied the Newfie……  “You’d be amazed how strong you get, when you bite your own nuts !!”…