I am busy slogging through all the posts I missed during NaNoWriMo – I follow the most prolific bloggers! Yesterday I opened my email to find 455 to read! I will get there eventually, thanks for your patience. And thanks for coming back even though I virtually took a month off.
A Saskatchewan farmer and his wife, on their way back home in January, are at an airport in Arizona awaiting their flight. They were dressed in heavy boots, parka, scarf, mittens all ready to head home to the Canadian winter.
An older American couple standing nearby is intrigued by their manner of dress. The wife says to her husband, “Look at that couple. I wonder where they are from?”
He replies, “How would I know?”She counters, “You could go and ask them.”
He says, “I do not really care. You want to know, you go and ask them.”
She decides to do just that and walks over to the couple and asks,”Excuse me. Looking at the way you are dressed, I wondered where you are from?”
The Canadian farmer replies, “Saskatoon, Saskatchewan”.
The woman returns to her husband, who asks, “So, where are they from?”
She replies, “I don’t know. They don’t speak English! “Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the Ark wasn’t leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
UnicornsDear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
LogicDear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma’s a bitch.
Sincerely,
The TitanicDear United States ,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
CanadaDear Yahoo,
I’ve never heard anyone say, “I don’t know, let’s Yahoo! it…”
just saying…
Sincerely,Dear 2013,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF happened?
Sincerely,
1985
Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea… Just kidding! They’re mostly dead.
Sincerely,
BP OilDear Saturn,
I liked it, so I put a ring on it.
Sincerely,
GodDear Skin-Colored Band Aids,
Please make one for every skin color.
Sincerely,
Black peopleDear Scissors,
I feel your pain… no one wants to run with me, either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin
Dear World of Warcraft,
Thank you for ensuring my son’s virginity.
Sincerely,
Parents EverywhereDear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely,
Nail Salon LadiesDear Ugly People,
You’re welcome.
Sincerely,
AlcoholDear iPhone,
Please stop spellchecking all of my rude words into nice words. You piece of shut.
Sincerely,
Every iPhone UserDear Man,
It’s cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant
Tickle Me Tuesday – 121013
December 10, 2013
Mark Petruska
Dec 10, 2013 @ 09:20:57
Wouldn’t get much better if they were from Kamloops, either.
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benzeknees
Dec 10, 2013 @ 10:12:49
Or maybe Medicine Hat!
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Ron
Dec 10, 2013 @ 09:25:06
Benze, these are HYSTERICAL! Loved them all, but I think my favorite is…
“Dear Man,
It’s cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant”
Bwhahahahahahaha!
I so enjoy these Tickle Me Tuesday posts!
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benzeknees
Dec 10, 2013 @ 10:11:36
Glad you like it Ron & thanks so much for letting me know the comments were off!
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bearmancartoons
Dec 10, 2013 @ 10:33:33
haha the twilight joke was hilarious
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benzeknees
Dec 10, 2013 @ 16:30:46
I had honestly never thought of it before!
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pouringmyartout
Dec 10, 2013 @ 10:43:09
Oh dang it… I am actually laughing out loud, and since I hate the abbreviation, I have to spell the whole thing out… sigh…
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benzeknees
Dec 10, 2013 @ 16:33:07
Glad you enjoyed it Art!
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pouringmyartout
Dec 10, 2013 @ 17:09:32
Well I did.
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Elyse
Dec 10, 2013 @ 13:14:53
Welcome back Benze — these were great. But …
Dear United States ,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada
Seriously? Bieber has been punishing us a lot longer … But oh how I hate those photos of Miley
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benzeknees
Dec 10, 2013 @ 16:34:01
Miley has been around for a lot longer than Bieber, but like him getting more & more “out there”
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Elyse
Dec 10, 2013 @ 16:36:16
Perhaps we can find a planet for the two of them and spare the Earth.
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benzeknees
Dec 10, 2013 @ 20:05:41
Oh, please, can we? Please? Pretty please with sugar on top?
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photosfromtheloonybin
Dec 10, 2013 @ 19:02:45
You had both the hubby and I chuckling tonight. These are fantastic!!
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benzeknees
Dec 10, 2013 @ 20:06:10
I can only do what I can do! I chuckled too!
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Gail Gregg
Dec 10, 2013 @ 22:57:14
Thanks for the laughs!
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benzeknees
Dec 11, 2013 @ 15:47:56
So welcome!
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Edward Hotspur
Dec 12, 2013 @ 16:21:40
These little notes were awesome! You very funny gal. And I don’t hardly ever use that word ‘gal’ that much.
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benzeknees
Dec 12, 2013 @ 16:49:28
Thanks Hotspur! Even if you did call me gal (?)
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Edward Hotspur
Dec 12, 2013 @ 17:58:13
Chick? Girl? Woman? Lady? I don’t know what to call a female who is somewhat younger than me.
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benzeknees
Dec 13, 2013 @ 15:49:17
Flattery will get you everywhere Hotspur! BTW, I’m older than you!
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Edward Hotspur
Dec 13, 2013 @ 15:50:29
NO you’re not. You’re what, late 20s right?
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benzeknees
Dec 13, 2013 @ 17:49:42
You’re so good for my ego Hotspur! I have sweaters older than 20 years old!
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Edward Hotspur
Dec 13, 2013 @ 18:05:29
That you got at the thrift store… so?
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benzeknees
Dec 13, 2013 @ 18:52:25
Hahahahahahaha!
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Sherry Ellis
Dec 15, 2013 @ 14:49:23
Those are funny! My grandfather was born in Saskatchewan!
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benzeknees
Dec 16, 2013 @ 14:40:15
Thanks for stopping by!
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TBM
Dec 16, 2013 @ 02:41:56
I love these. The Sarah Palin one is my fave. Now that I live in London I don’t hear much about her. Thank goodness!
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benzeknees
Dec 16, 2013 @ 14:05:10
I don’t have to hear as much about her as Americans, but it’s still too much
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