I’d like to wish all my friends in the US a Happy Thanksgiving!
The pro football team had just finished their daily practice session when a large turkey came strutting onto the field. While the players gazed in amazement, the turkey walked up to the head coach and demanded a tryout. Everyone stared in silence as the turkey caught pass after pass and ran right through the defensive line. When the turkey returned to the sidelines, the coach shouted, “You’re terrific!!! Sign up for the season, and I’ll see to it that you get a huge bonus.” “Forget the bonus,” the turkey said, “All I want to know is, does the season go past Thanksgiving Day?”
Q: Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
A: Yes – a building can’t jump at all.
Thanksgiving dinner is a unique experience. It’s like an orgy that’s rated G.
It’s the day before Thanksgiving, and the butcher is just locking up when a man begins pounding on the front door.
“Please let me in,” says the man desperately. “I forgot to buy a turkey, and my wife will kill me if I don’t come home with one.”
“Okay,” says the butcher. “Let me see what I have left.” He goes into the freezer and discovers that there’s only one scrawny turkey left. He brings it out to show the man.
“That’s one is too skinny. What else you got?” says the man.
The butcher takes the bird back into the freezer and waits a few minutes and brings the same turkey back out to the man.
“Oh, no,” says the man, “That one doesn’t look any better. You better give me both of them!”
Read more at http://www.theholidayspot.com/thanksgiving/thanksgiving_jokes.htm#oEkic1LABx0SJE
The Laughing Housewife
Nov 25, 2014 @ 03:09:35
Thanks for the giggles!
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 09:31:40
This must seem so foreign to you – you don’t have Thanksgiving at any time of the year. In the US it’s a bigger deal than Christmas!
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The Laughing Housewife
Nov 25, 2014 @ 12:37:50
I know! But we get so much American TV, we know all about pumpkin pie and going around the table saying what you’re thankful for 🙂
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 15:25:01
It all looks so wonderful on TV but it’s rarely ever as good as it shows. Family members fight with each other, your sister-in-law tries to outdo you by bringing an extravagant dessert which makes your jello mold look dinky, someone always talks during the football games & then gets upset when they’re told to shh, kids spill food all over the beautiful tablecloth you searched every store in the mall to get, etc., etc.
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The Laughing Housewife
Nov 27, 2014 @ 04:05:31
Christmas is the same. Impossible expectations can never be lived up to.
Happy Thanksgiving, anyway!
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Mishka Jenkins
Nov 25, 2014 @ 03:13:46
Ha! Awesome 😀
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 09:32:08
Thank you, thank you, I’m here till Friday . . .
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List of X
Nov 25, 2014 @ 06:07:34
Some people’s Thanksgiving dinners are actually rated R for mature language and mild violence.
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 09:32:52
It’s hard to be civilized with some of the people in your family!
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pouringmyartout
Nov 25, 2014 @ 06:26:51
Ours is rated X… We all eat naked and read X’s blog.
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 09:33:22
So, is this our your daughter’s sex education got started?
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pouringmyartout
Nov 25, 2014 @ 14:26:05
You cant take me literally
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 15:22:01
This is my blog – I can take you any way I want to (get your mind out of the gutter!)
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pouringmyartout
Nov 25, 2014 @ 15:58:46
Ha
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Ron
Nov 25, 2014 @ 07:25:41
“Oh, no,” says the man, “That one doesn’t look any better. You better give me both of them!”
Bwhahahahahahaha! Hilarious, Benze!
Happy Thanksgiving, my friend!
((((( You )))))
X
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 09:34:21
Happy Thanksgiving Ron! We had ours in October – tends to get a mite cooler earlier here than in the states! Got snow yet?
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Carrie Rubin
Nov 25, 2014 @ 08:21:33
Gobble gobble! Thanks for some laughs. 🙂
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 09:35:01
Thanks for stopping by Carrie!
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Elyse
Nov 25, 2014 @ 10:33:28
Thanks, Benze! My wish for you is that you have a terrific, feel-good week!
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 12:14:45
Thanks Elyse! Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
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Gibber
Nov 25, 2014 @ 10:34:33
LOL!
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 12:15:32
Have you noticed Gibber & giblets are similar?
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Gibber
Nov 25, 2014 @ 12:16:34
Oh my gosh that’s so funny! It never crossed my mind!
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benzeknees
Nov 25, 2014 @ 15:21:06
Of course, I’m not saying you look like a giblet . . .
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Gibber
Nov 25, 2014 @ 16:37:43
Sure sure!
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Mark Petruska
Dec 02, 2014 @ 11:38:13
“All I want to know is, does the season go past Thanksgiving Day?”
Not if you’re the Oakland Raiders…
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benzeknees
Dec 02, 2014 @ 12:44:29
Or a Hamilton Tiger Cat! Calgary Stampeders won the Grey Cup on Nov. 30!
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